The Weight of Words: A Reflection on Pain, Perception, and Personal Liberation

Recently, I underwent a third, difficult oral surgery.

Once again, the pain and discomfort were so intense that I could only manage a simple liquid diet for two weeks, followed by soft foods for another two. For those of you who have gone through something similar, you know the kind of excruciating experience I’m talking about. The basic acts of chewing, swallowing, and even talking felt nearly impossible. While it was undeniably difficult, it also became a lens through which I saw, for the millionth time, something far more insidious: the way we, as women, are conditioned to view ourselves and our bodies.

During my recovery, some of the women in my life reached out to check on me, asking how I was doing. When I responded honestly, saying, “It’s painful, and I can’t eat,” some of them shared first reactions that took me by surprise in the moment:

“How much weight have you lost?”
“At least you’re losing weight!”
“Maybe I should have oral surgery so I can’t eat for a while... maybe I’d lose weight, too.”

These comments from women I love and respect stopped me in my tracks. It struck me, first and foremost, how the immediate focus was on my body—its size, weight, and the potential for loss—rather than on my recovery. Luckily, my surgery revealed I didn’t have cancer, which had been my biggest concern. Yet, my struggle seemed to be viewed as an opportunity to lose weight. This reflection highlighted something far deeper: even later in life, the default assumption for women is that all we desire is to be smaller, thinner, to take up less space. And not just to be smaller, but to be smaller at any cost—even if that cost is pain and discomfort.

What saddened me most was how reflexive these responses were. These weren’t malicious comments but conditioned ones. They were a product of the cultural landscape that women have been raised in—a landscape where the primary measure of our worth and value is often how closely we conform to an idealized, often unattainable, image of what a woman should look like. It was assumed that I, too, likely would want to lose weight through any means necessary, including difficult and depleting ones.

I wondered... What about my well-being? What about the fact that I was enduring weeks of pain and starvation? What if I am content with my body exactly as it is?

The deeper issue here is the systematic conditioning that women have faced for generations. We have been told—directly and indirectly—that our worth is linked to our appearance, our body size, and our ability to fit into this narrow mold society has created for us. We are led to believe that we cannot grow older, that we cannot gain weight, and that we must always strive to be something other than what we are.

The truth is, I’m not the first person to challenge these outdated beliefs, and I’ve certainly been guilty of buying into them myself, even pushing the same misguided agenda onto others in the past—more times than I’d like to admit.

These reflections are not born out of anger or contempt but out of sadness. Sadness for myself and for the women around me who have been raised under the same pressures. I feel sadness that most of us have been conditioned to value thinness over health, and appearance over authenticity, unconsciously. I feel sadness when I look back and realize that I once believed that in order to be worthy, I had to change myself to fit into a world that was never built for me. I was once caught in that trap, too, seeking external validation through my appearance, believing that if I could only meet the ideal, I would find happiness, acceptance, and peace.

Oh, how I wish I could go back in time and guide my younger self onto a healthier, saner path sooner—one where I knew my worth was never tied to my physicality, but to the strength and authenticity I now know I have always carried in my one miraculous and amazing body.

But here's the thing: I HAVE chosen to step out of that cycle. I am done subscribing to a system that tells me I need to change who I am to be enough. I don’t need to be fixed. I don’t need to shrink. I don’t need to be anything other than what I am right now—perfectly whole, perfectly human, and perfectly enough as I am.

I won’t bend myself into a pretzel anymore to meet some unrealistic standard that wasn’t designed with my true nature at heart. I won’t pour money into remedies and products designed to fix what isn’t broken. My body, my size, and my age do not need to be adjusted to fit a cultural narrative that doesn’t serve or align with me. And I’m not alone in this. I know many of you have arrived at the same crossroads and, thankfully, chosen a new way, too.

I invite all women who are ready and willing to join me in consciously and consistently rejecting these harmful, ingrained beliefs, messages, and behaviors. Let’s come together and unravel the lies we’ve been told. Let’s walk away from a system that profits off of imposed insecurities, and instead, build a world where we celebrate women for our strength, our authenticity, and our true beauty and aliveness—inside and out. I want to live a life where I am allowed to take up space, to grow older with grace, and to embrace my body as it is, without shame or apology. Don’t you?

This is the moment to fully acknowledge the distorted reality of the world we live in and to make the courageous decision to break free. We don’t need to lose weight to be worthy. We don’t need to shrink to fit in. We are enough.

It’s like that scene in the Barbie movie where Barbie is sitting next to an older woman on a bus bench. She turns to her and says, “You are SO beautiful!” The older woman, breaking the expected code of modesty or self-deprecation, doesn’t respond with the typical “I’m so old” or “No, I’m not” or “Are you crazy?” Instead, she simply says, “I KNOW!” And in that moment, Barbie smiles, her face lighting up with the beauty of receiving that profound truth.

Greta Gerwig, the screenwriter and director of Barbie, was asked to cut that scene because the editors believed it did not hold much value or significance for the story. But Gerwig pushed back (and clearly won!), saying, “This is what the entire movie is all about.” Exactly, Greta Gerwig. Exactly.

That simple exchange encapsulates something profound: the act of accepting and celebrating our own worth, without apology, without minimizing ourselves to make others more comfortable. It’s about truly connecting with the life force within—our inherent worth and wholeness—without the need for validation or permission. It’s a powerful, subtle reminder that we don’t have to shrink, explain, or apologize for our existence, especially as we grow older and our bodies shift and change.

And for the record: as a menopausal woman who’s prioritizing strength over size anyway, I lost ZERO weight during my surgery recovery. Bodies at this age don’t respond well to starvation. Instead, we respond to nourishment, connection, self-care, self-love, and healthy routines—not forced liquid diets and deprivation.

This is precisely what The Medicine Walk is all about. It’s about noticing the old, habitual ways we’ve been conditioned to participate in the suffering and devaluation of ourselves and others. The ways we automatically reduce ourselves, undermine our value, and settle for less than what we truly deserve. We have been taught to minimize our brilliance, to silence our truths, and to conform to a standard that never had our best interests in mind. But it’s time to stop that. It’s time to extend grace and compassion toward those earlier, hypnotized-by-culture versions of ourselves and decide NOW to show up in a way that’s different—a way that’s more truthful, real, and aligned with our essence. Together.

The Medicine Walk invites us to return to our truth. It invites us to step out of the shadows of societal pressure and into the light of who we really are. It calls for us to unlearn the narratives that tell us we are not enough, to break the chains of insecurity and self-doubt, and to reclaim our inherent worth. We can show up as our full, unapologetic selves—no matter our size, our age, or the stage of life we’re in. We can embrace our bodies and our stories as sacred, and with that acceptance, step into the world with confidence, power, and peace. Together.

I see this as a powerful conversation. A conversation for women, for people, reclaiming our stories, our significance, our right to be here. It's about not just knowing our worth but embodying it in every part of our lives. No longer shrinking, no longer apologizing, no longer buying into a narrative that keeps us small. Together.

What would it be like if we simply said to one another, on a regular basis, “You’re perfect and wonderful just as you are. Nothing needs to change for me or the world. Unless you, yourself, want it to change. Just for YOU.”

So, as I reflect on my own painful recovery and the comments that were made, I’m reminded of this: We have the power to change how we respond to the world and to each other. We can break free from these harmful narratives and create a space where we uplift one another—not based on superficial measures, but on the recognition of our intrinsic value. When we stop apologizing for our existence, when we stop treating our worth as negotiable, that’s when we start to truly thrive.

This is why I travel the path of The Medicine Walk, and I hope you will join me and the growing number of others who are ready to live wholly and freely. Together, we can practice unraveling the lies that have kept us in suffering or confusion and step into the fullness of our beings, just as we are—knowing, like the older woman on the bench, that we are enough. Always have been. Always will be.

Walking with you,
Mary

🏹

Are you ready to rid yourself of poisonous, conditioned messaging?

The next time you connect with a woman you love and trust, we invite you to take your own Medicine Walk and reflect on these questions:

• When have you noticed your own pain being reframed or dismissed through the lens of body image? How did it feel?
  

• What cultural messages about worth and weight have you internalized—and are you ready to question or release?
  

• What would it mean—for you—to truly believe you are already enough, without needing to change your body?
  

• What does “taking up space” mean to you today—in body, voice, or presence?
  

• Can you recall a moment when you felt fully at peace in your body, just as it is? What helped you get there?
  

• What lies about your worth are you ready to lay down—today?

Take The Medicine Walk: A New Path for Feminine Trust and Leadership

Welcome to The Medicine Walk—

…a sacred space where women* of all walks of life come together to reclaim our power, embrace our wisdom, and lead from a place of deep feminine trust and authority. This is not about following old, worn-out scripts. It’s about shedding the conditioned ways we’ve been taught to shrink, perform, and disconnect. In a world that has long sought to silence, commodify, and reshape us, we are choosing something different—something ancient and alive. Here, we imagine a world where the feminine is fully expressed—uncensored, celebrated, and trusted for its deep knowing and unique brilliance. 

We remember a time when women were upheld by the village, honored for our wisdom, and supported by one another. And now, it’s time for us to walk ourselves and each other back to that original home—arm in arm, sturdy and strong, steady and sovereign. We dream this place back into being and lead from it—together—unfiltered, unapologetic, and boundless.

The Medicine Walk is not about telling you how to be—it’s about offering real stories, grounded insights, and accessible practices you can weave into your life to lead with clarity, agency, and purpose. Here, we invite you to explore new ways of thinking, responding, and leading—rooted in feminine wisdom, ancestral knowing, and embodied truth. Imagine using your voice where it truly matters. Taking action from a place of healing and alignment. Practicing truth-telling—with yourself and with others. This is not about perfection, but about showing up real, curious, and courageous.

The Medicine Walk is a community where we witness one another, where we belong. We celebrate the full spectrum of life experience—failures and successes—knowing transformation is often messy, uncomfortable, and deeply human. And still, we walk. Because we need each other now more than ever. We need *you*—fully, unapologetically, and in all your brilliance. Your thread belongs in this tapestry. 

So, what exactly is The Medicine Walk?

It’s a portal. A community. A living, breathing conversation. The Medicine Walk isn’t just a place; it’s a WAY of being, where feminine leadership doesn’t thrive through control or competition but through trust, connection, embodiment, and real, honest communication. It's a return to the self, to one another, and to the wisdom that has always been within us—wisdom that’s not just for us, but for the world in desperate need of healing.

This isn’t a quick fix or a trend. It’s an unfolding, a collective remembering of the strength and power we’ve always carried within us. This is about honoring the feminine—not as an afterthought or an add-on—but as essential medicine for a culture starved for healing and change.

Who is The Medicine Walk for?

The Medicine Walk is for women* who are ready to walk, lead, heal, guide, and rise in new ways. It’s for activists, artists, mothers, elders, rebels, teachers, wayfarers, and those in between. If you’re ready to unlearn the outdated stories, language, and conditioned responses that have defined you and instead step into your power as the sovereign, resilient, deeply knowing woman* you are—this space is for you. It’s a place to remember who you are—a return to your brilliance, your imagination, your voice. The world needs you. You need you. And we need each other—to walk one another home in solidarity, to awaken our shared remembering, and to ignite the kind of visionary ideas that don’t just restore us—they change the world.

Together, we explore:

• Healing & Personal Power: Trusting ourselves, reclaiming our voices, and breaking free from cycles of oppression.
  

• Feminine Leadership: Redefining power to lead with integrity, wisdom, and compassion.
  

• Creativity & Expression: Using art, movement, and words as tools for transformation.
  

• Community & Connection: Rebuilding relationships and redefining trust—not as rivals, but as allies walking side by side.

A Call for Feminine Leadership and Healing

The world is changing. We, as women*, are no longer waiting for permission to fully and wholly step into our power. The old systems that have drained and confined us are being rejected. What’s emerging is something profoundly new—something that aligns with who we truly are and the future we want to create.

But change starts within. True transformation begins with healing ourselves. We are detoxing from the shame, fear, and insecurity instilled in us by patriarchal messages. We are healing the wounds of competition, comparison, and judgment. And the time is now—to let go of the old stories that no longer serve us and step into the truth of who we are: beautiful, powerful, sovereign women*.

Healing Through Connection

At the heart of The Medicine Walk is the belief that true healing happens in connection—with ourselves and with one another. For too long, we’ve been taught that women* must compete and criticize to succeed (again, unconsciously and consciously). But that ends here. We are rewriting that story. We are healing our relationships and creating a culture of trust, support, and empowerment so we can lead, change, and create. Truth-telling is part of this healing—truth in how we see ourselves, truth in how we show up for each other. When we shed the layers of oppression that have been forcibly placed on our backs, we make space for authenticity, vulnerability, and real, meaningful connection. The Medicine Walk is where women* come together—not as rivals—but as allies, walking side by side in the direction of something far more powerful than any of us could reach alone.

Reimagining Competition, Comparison, and Criticism

Many of us have internalized messages—subtle or direct—that tell us we need to compete, compare, or diminish one another to find our place. We've been taught that our worth is tied to being “better” or standing out in a certain way. But what if there’s another way? One that invites us to celebrate, collaborate, and support each other instead.

Imagine entering a space not with guardedness or self-doubt, but with the freedom to offer support, energy, love, and inclusion. What shifts when we acknowledge each other’s humanity—sharing in both struggle and celebration—and choose to lift one another up as a reflection of our deepest values? That’s the kind of world we’re exploring and nurturing through The Medicine Walk: one rooted in connection, not comparison.

The Power of Ritual and Intentional Living

Ritual is a powerful tool for reconnecting and healing. What if we began to ritualize our relationships routinely? What if we made space for intentional, deep connection, where trust and mutual care are our top priorities? Rituals ground us in what truly matters. They remind us to make relationships a priority, heal the wounds of the past, and create a new way of being.

The Medicine Walk envisions a world where women* naturally honor one another and the wisdom of the feminine. Together, we reclaim joy, trust, love, and acceptance.

Reclaim Your Power: Take Action Now

This work isn’t easy. But it is necessary. For far too long, we’ve been seduced into spending time, energy, and money on superficial standards—appearance, success, perfection—all things that drain our vital lifeforce and distract us from our true essential nature.. Now is the time to redirect that energy toward creating meaningful change in our world.

When we reclaim our personal power, heal our relationships, and lead with authenticity, we shift the very fabric of society. We become the mothers of reinvention. And together, we will create a world where women* lead, live, and love from a place of true sovereignty.

Are you ready to join us?

The time is now. This isn’t a business or a product to sell; it’s an invitation to a deeper, more meaningful way of living. The Medicine Walk is a place to learn, to connect, to heal, and to lead in ways that feel authentic, embodied, and empowered. We’re waiting for you.

Follow and engage with our content and start your journey toward feminine trust, leadership, and transformation today @medicinewalk.co.

Meet the Facilitators: 

• Deena (she, her): Seeker. Storykeeper. Soul Guide. Holder of ancestral wisdom.

• Mary (she, her): Wanderer. Wayfinder. Wordsmith. Guardian of feminine liberation.

Join the Pack

Your journey begins here. Subscribe to our newsletter and receive inspiring stories, teachings, and resources that will help you reclaim your power and lead with integrity. Together, we are forging a new path for feminine trust and leadership. Let’s rewrite the story of what it means to be feminine in this world—and step into our collective power.

*AN IMPORTANT NOTE FROM THE FACILITATORS OF THE MEDICINE WALK: The terms "woman" or "women" in this space are meant to include anyone who embodies the feminine, regardless of gender identity. While we acknowledge the limitations of language in fully capturing the complexity of gender and identity, our intention is to create a space for reclaiming and reframing femininity in a way that serves all who resonate with it today. We approach this work with integrity, inclusivity, and respect, fostering conversations that honor diverse experiences and perspectives.